We had a great time and much fun and big success at the 2nd Annual Walk for Singleton Moms last Saturday. Cathy and I want to thank each of you for your support. We raised over $1600 thanks to you. The numbers aren't official yet but Singleton Moms doubled their profits from last year.
Imran is 71 years old. Picture found here, you know, one of my favorite places on the internet.
Imran reminds me not to wait. Here's some of the latest from your bobJuan.
Here's a question I have for Microsoft, regarding Office 97. For the 1 of you who follow this blog you may remember this posting from May of last year.
Why didn't we just stop with faster
Why'd we try and make it better too?
My problem with coming in early is I love the mornings.
I love them afternoons too.
Nothing is as special as this.
boy, oh boy,
this damn moment.
leave the victim story, and come on home
I've seen things and been places.
I prefer it here with you.
I've prepared for happiness enough. (inspired by the quote below from Andre).
And from a real person: Seize from the moment its unique novelty, and do not prepare your joys. Andre Gide.
There are so many interesting and beautiful faces in this picture. From Tibet. Reminds me again, of how we're all in this together. Here's some of the latest from you bobJuan:
my house just made a new sound.
if you didnt' have your tv
how would you know how bad things are?
it's very very good here for me.
-or-
stop listening to what is being said about what is happening
pay attention for yourself.
what do you see?
job # 1: get ready to die
job #2: live it up.
Happiness is not circumstantial.
The less I do,
the fewer mistakes I make
And finally, from a real person:
It is best to be yourself,
imperial, plain and true. Robert Browning
Picture stolen from here.
Here's the end of what I had for the wedding. This was some sweet stuff I was playing with.
She's not the only one, and she's not everyone, but she is the best one, morning, noon and nite!
i'd do it again
with all of you and
more wine
the celebration is now
this is the time
on her wedding day
she gave all of herself
she knew this was one of those times
she would give like never before
before the nite was over
she had married us all
She is helping Ashley with her hair. There is more than an hour till the ceremony. They are more beautiful than tears. Anyone who saw them right now would never again search for a reason to love a woman. More than a wedding is going on here. They touch as they help each other with the fuss. It is no accident; it is more on purpose than anything they have ever done together. No hug could ever do this, at least not before today. Girls know how to sit with each other, wedding and mirror or not. These two are hardly more than one right now. Yet it is the two of them, and everyone who knows anything understands. They have been together since the day Ashley was born. They share a love that is before even then. The love spills softly over and around them this afternoon like snowflakes. You know how snowflakes are.
Ashley's heart feels bigger than ever, like a woman's heart, perhaps like her mom would feel sitting here with Andy, not wanting to be anywhere else. Hoping this does not go by too fast, for there is so much to love right now. The stillness of the room seems to hold it all together. Ashley remembers the crazy love between Andy and her mom. A bigger than life elephant in the room and everyone knows it kind of love. It was more than that. She knows in some ways Andy is the closest thing she has to her Mom, a lifelong royal-blue thread she can count on. She is clear today about what she is doing. She is standing up for her Mom and Andy. It is who she is right now. All the other stuff that is only Ashley will wait for later. She will leave some of it forever behind too. Today she is happy to be about a love that was waiting for her the day she was born. Today, what is before makes everything bigger from now on. Today, Ashley is a woman in a tradition of beautiful women.
Andy finds her love for Michelle again in doing something about it. Today it is loving Ashley. She was younger than Ashley when this whole thing started. Yes, it's Andy's wedding day, but Andy is happiest when her love is in motion. Each perfect day she has ever had included a love for all her life. Especially those close to her. Since Michelle left, she has had a sadness about her not being here to enjoy this day, or her kids. To have Michelle here right now would be at least divine. Knowing how her mind works, she chooses to be full of the Michelle that is here now in Ashley. She breathes in every bit of Michelle she can. More than ever she knows, Michelle has never left her side.
They sit together like sisters or more
Eyes that do not hide anything tonite
There is more than just the two of them here
As Andy has always hoped
Michelle brought Ashley to her wedding.
And now, Ashley brings Michelle.
I've moved some of my favorites to the web. Click on the picture to get over to the album.
Here's the bobJuan's Toast from Saturday Nite.
You all know my favorite son Eli. Let me introduce you to my newest son Ryan.
As you go to bed each nite
hold each other tight
no clothes in sight
would be all right
let your troubles go each day
get under them covers and play
- OR -
you know you're getting it right
when you're still finding new places to go
under the covers at night
I'm happy that my fantasies about marriage didn't come true.
the real thing has turned out way better.
Here are some more things I figured out all on my own along the way:
· movie love is not
· jealousy is for teenagers
· we're all in this together
· women are different than men, thankfully
· i'd rather be happy than right
· it keeps getting better
· and it gets better on purpose
· i am responsible for how good this goes
· what needs changing the most is my attitude
the further i get down my own path
the closer it gets to yours.
Until recently, more or less, she's been my girl. day and nite, year in, year out. She's come close to leaving me before, and I knew it would come to pass one day, all the way. I miss her already. Ryan, it's your turn man. Sit on the patio at nite and enjoy this beautiful woman as often as you can. First, tell her about what you got going on, and then let her tell you about her day. Eat something delicious, drink something marvelous, and talk about the things you love out loud. She can show you how if you need a little help. She showed me more than a time or two. Did I say I miss her already?
We had a superb day on Saturday. The weather forecast was perfectly wrong. You can see in this picture some of the beautiful things going on.
I'm still looking for where we will put "all" of the pictures we want to share. Stay tuned.
Andy and Ryan asked me to perform (do) the ceremony. For weeks I worked on what I would say. Wanting to say only what I knew and felt, not just what I thought about marriage. Tough challenge. I fell even more deeply in love with my Cathy as part of the process. For that I am grateful to have had the chance. Plus, I knew when they asked me, I would only give my best for them. As the son of a baptist preacher I had to work out all the "preaching" with Cathy's help. And keep it to 5 or so minutes. I deleted some good stuff! Here it is for those of you who are interested.
Dearly beloved, we gather here today to celebrate the hopes, commitments, dreams and marriage of Ryan and Andy.
We bring our wishes for happiness as we promise them our hearts as well.
We commit to help thru the tough times and be thankful for the easier ones
To remind them when troubles come, they also go.
Love stays for the coming and the going.
To befriend not only each of them, but both of them and forever also will we see them as one inspiring love.
Today is the day we celebrate our love for each other too.
Our family gets bigger and better today.
And now, the love of two.
To prepare for tonite, I asked myself the following kinds of questions. I recommend you try it sometime.
What does it mean to be married, for two people to settle in with each other like this? What does it mean to say I love you? What does it mean to be happily married? And what is a perfect marriage anyway? Why do we do it? What is the payoff? Why do we stay?
For those of you who are interested, you should know there are some experts in the field here tonite. I recommend you speak with Charles & June, Jim & Terri, and my wife Cathy if you have any questions about what it means to love forever, and big. They are the inspiration behind much of what I have to say, and why I am more happily married than ever.
Here are some answers I found in my own heart. It is best to experience these things yourself, for words are so very inadequate. However, we will try together tonite, for the sake of Andy and Ryan and this blessed occasion.
In silence I found my love
for in silence I asked my real questions
and I heard the answers
no one who approaches love, God or silence
with an open heart
comes away unchanged
there's nothing left for me now, but to love
We have come to learn
love is bigger than one, it takes at least two
life is not lived alone
we need each other
and we need a container that holds more than one for our love
There is no use resisting this love
what else you gonna do?
Ask anyone who knows, love is all you need.
Your family, children, and close friends will do
the chances you need
are here with them
for it to be any good or fun at all
let them contain your love
for God is love and God wants only love for us
you know all good things come from God, ask anyone who knows
love them up and
love them big
Marriage is the mother of all containers,
don't you know
for here you show up by choice and
you make it from scratch
you cannot quit being a mother, a sister, or a father
but you can quit being married, and you can run
so marriage is where the big dicey spicy fun comes in
After all, here you take your clothes off
your faults, altitudes, habits and belly are exposed
almost every day if you're lucky
leaving you vulnerable
and available
for the big love we all have
the sweetest intimacy
you are here for the sake of love
not of blood
love is awake, and raw, or nothing at all
it's in the kitchen, the garden, at school,
and the bedroom too
when you get bored take a walk in a park
ask God to remind you about the good stuff
then call your mom, for she knows too
love is like the wind
it is real when its moving
when its more than just a word
it can turn you around sometimes
and back again
if you're lucky
may you be brave enough to be so lucky
marriage is love is commitment
to marry is to take hold of the juicy power of big love
you don't have this because you are pretty
or lucky
we're not talking about movie love here
it lasts forever because
it is not dependent upon circumstances
or your body
it does not wait
it always occurs now
it comes from within
not without
it has nothing to do with what others are doing
love is not something you have
it is something you do
love is fun
if it's not, you're not doing it right
you are thinking too small
perhaps about yourself again
you enjoy your baby, and your world as they are
not as you think they should be
they are usually better
than our ideas about them anyway
don't you agree?
get a second opinion if need be
just watch um
keep up
pay attention,
you can feel their wind in your hair
you can remember why all this got started
let it start again, every day.
love is like bread
make some fresh every day
and use lots of butter and jelly too
may you share some of that warm stuff
all the way in every way
love is like a snowflake
each one is different
you would not dare consider
changing a single one
may you celebrate one another
like no other
my goodness, may we all
and so then, in marriage, you can perfect yourself
as a lover of life
and therefore as a human being
For God made us to love,
and what he made us for is perfect
You can love big here, because it is up to you
how big you love
There are no limits on love
Let love remind you of how important you are
for it takes you too to make two
And so Andy & Ryan,
As you make your promises and vows to each other now, may you remember always that everyone here tonite promises to support, honor and cherish your eternal love for each other too.
[vows]
In the greatest of wedding traditions, I am honored to introduce to you Ryan and Andy as husband and wife. You may now kiss your bride.
Andy and Ryan are getting closer by the minute now to their wedding day. Saturday at 4:00PM. There's hardly any time to stop it. We will have pictures and blog posts next week, celebrating the occasion....
A couple of other things. First, today is the 5th of the Month. Please do not forget to donate your $5.00 this month to Singleton Moms here. Cathy and I just did. I don't need to remind you how easy it is for a bunch of us to give just a little and make some very special women's lives way mo-better. Also, if you're in Phoenix, why don't you register for, or at least show up at the walk on the 21st of February. Short of that you can always donate large sums of $$ to our Walk Page.
And now a little bobJuan stuff:
when we got the receipt, it seemed a bit high
sure enough, they were charging $12.00 for a glass of wine
when our server came around again
i asked if perhaps there was a mistake
she said, no, it was a Robert Mondavi
I'm like, hell is he here?
A few things Morrie taught me.
death
not rhymeless or poemless
many have and so will i
might not be next or last
between now and then
the good stuff
now I can
not sure about then
the summation and declaration
of how crazy I loved
of how fearless I loved
If who you are is what you can do, you don't want to get old
you'll soon be nothing at all.
If who you are is only about you, the day will come
when you is all you have
when you'll be alone
One minute I’m enjoying the ride home, hair flying in the wind, next I’m as gone as summer. Time’s up, put your pencils down. You just got kicked off the island
